As one who vows never to get bored (life is to precious and much too short to get bored!) I must admit it appeared our trip on a bus could present a challenge for the Anti-Boredom Act.
Lon and I were on a return flight from Canada when electrical and snowstorms prompted the pilot to make an emergency landing four hours too soon. The airline was kind enough to “rent” a bus for the entire load of people heading to the airport.
As we climbed on the commercial bus, I knew it was going to be a long trip. Figure that there is snow and ice on the road and four hours to our destination turns into much longer.
So… Lon and I climbed aboard the bus with our fellow travelers.
As is custom for me, we headed toward a seat near the back. It may be that I’ve been a Zeller with a “Z” so long that I’m used to being at the end of the line (or bus) or maybe it’s just because I’ve never been a front row kind of gal (except that time that odd college professor thought it would be funny to put Penny in the second row)
Anyway…You get to know a lot about people just from spending time with them on a bus. We noticed after a couple hours into our trip that there were the following types of people aboard:
1. The talker. He wants everyone to know about his life. Yep, he sat in front of us. An executive-sort of person in nice clothing, he talked loud enough on his many cell phone calls that we knew everything about him in a matter of minutes – what he ate for dinner, what he ate for breakfast, what he ate for a snack, what he does for a living, etc. Earplugs anyone?
2. The sleeper. She sat several rows up from us and slept the whole time. I never sleep well when I’m not in my own bed and especially not in the confines of a bus with a blizzard outside. The sleeper never makes a peep, except for the occasional mumbling in her sleep. She is recognized by the drool puddle on the seat next to her.
3. The serious one. These types are very quiet and don’t even laugh when there’s something funny to laugh about. These zombies usually stare straight ahead in daydream mode and are grand prize winners of the “stare game.” There were several of these on this bus. Hmmm. What if the serious one married the talker? Just sayin’.
4. The bus whisperers. These folks whisper the entire time, as if their secrets will get out if they speak in an audible tone. It makes listeners feel as though they are constantly missing out on important secrets. It makes me wish I had a cup with a string that I could hold to the back of the seat so I could “listen in.”
5. The reader. I love this type. They read a novel from front to back in a day and you can tell from the expressions on their faces what is happening in their book. Sometimes they even have sound effects for when they’re reading the really scary parts. (These are the best types, especially for us authors!)
6. The bathroom lady (self-explanatory). You can recognize this poor gal by the fact that she’s never in her seat…
7. Secret Simon. He’s a scary dude dressed in black from his head to his toe. His beady little eyes dart around and he has over 500 body piercings and a bad hairdo that looks like when I’m only half done with giving Lon a buzz cut. He talks into the collar of his jacket like he’s an undercover FBI agent and eats Junior Mints like they’re becoming extinct…
You won’t want to miss the second half of this post when I discuss some hilarious games you can rope your husband into playing on a four-hour bus trip! Until next time, have a great weekend!