4 Ways to Draw Closer to Your Spouse

Penny Zeller, Christian Author

Need some suggestions on how to draw closer to your spouse? Here are four to get you started…

1. Take time alone with your spouse. You hear this all the time, but do you realize how important it is? Even if it’s lunch once a week or a weekend getaway, time alone without the kids is crucial. Swap babysitting days with your closest friends. Be creative!


2. Take time to forgive. Lon and I have been married 21 years and trust me, there have been a few times when we’ve gotten on each other’s last nerve. Yes, really! So, are there things that bother you about your spouse? Pray God will help you to forgive. Pray not that God will change your spouse, but that He would change the way you respond to the things your spouse does. Pray you would respond in a God-honoring way and draw upon His grace to do just that!

3. Take time to be thoughtful. One of Lon’s favorite foods is No-Bake Cookies (if you don’t believe me, please see my post gluten free delicious no-bake cookie recipe  and how Lon overdosed on them! As such, I routinely make these cookies for him as a way to show him how much I love him.

As a writer of Christian romance, Lon shows his love for me by listening to the latest chapter, even though Christian romance novels are far from his list of favorite genres!

Leave each other notes in the morning, call each other, or send each other emails in the middle of the day. Lon and I have had a “running” note at times where we try to cram all we can on a little piece of paper that carries through everyday throughout the week. It can be silly, lovey-dovey, or a combination of both!

One of my favorite notes had these words on it added by Lon: “This is a recycled note.” 🙂

4. Take time for humor. Lon and I love to write humor blogs together about funny happenings in our everyday lives (if you don’t believe me, check out my post Why I’m Not a Master Chef ). We love to watch some of our favorite comedians together – Ken Davis or Bean and Bailey. Sometimes we’ll sit together and take time out to read all the funny emails we’ve received. Whatever you do, take some time for humor – just the two of you.

What a precious gift the Lord has given you in your spouse. Take the time to relish your time together – something that will only further cement the love that binds together what God created – marriage.



12 thoughts on “4 Ways to Draw Closer to Your Spouse

  1. definitely know about those last nerves as praise the Lord we were married 45 years last June–of course we were babies when we married –I was two weeks past graduating High School–Allen 3 years older so we basically raised each other! the crazy thing is after most blow ups the next day I can’t remember what started the fight! and again praising the Lord for forgiveness! I love making him laugh and I’m so goofy we have a lot of laughs most days! empty nesters so we lave lots of time just the 2–esp. since we both retired last year! God is so good!

  2. I know some couples who never take time alone together, and it’s hard on their marriage. My husband and I try to take a weekend away once a year just to be able to think of ourselves as lovers rather than parents. Date nights are also important to stay connected.

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