People joke about homeschool moms in long denim skirts, with no makeup, and hair buns with a dozen children and a van held together by duct tape. They make all meals from scratch and have three freezers each full of “make and freeze meals” as a backup.They live in the country, grow their own food, and can everything from jam to green beans.
Sure, there are many homeschool moms who fit that description, but there are also homeschool moms who wear sporty exercise clothes, have ponytails, wear makeup, and have pink glittery painted fingernails, have less than a dozen children, and drive an SUV held together by duct tape. That mom lives on the edge and never knows what’s for dinner until 15 minutes prior. She lives in a subdivision with an HOA, and her garden consists only of flowers. Canning never has been and never will be on her radar.
One of the things I love about homeschool moms is their diversity. They come in all shapes and sizes and live in a variety of neighborhoods from city apartments to farmhouses in the boonies 50 miles from the nearest town.
So, with this wide assortment of homeschool moms, how can you spot one? Or how might you give it away that you are one yourself?
You might be a homeschool mom if…
*You stalk the UPS guy each day as you patiently (or not so patiently!) await your curriculum delivery every August.
*When you go school clothes shopping, your main purchases are pajamas (for school uniforms, of course).
*Speaking of pajamas…neighbors have reported they’ve heard you joyfully exclaim, “It’s time for school! Get your jammies on!”
*Everything that happens during the day is a teaching opportunity because you think outside the box for assignments to give your kids a well-rounded education.
*You are ecstatic that your new otoscope arrived in the mail today. This will make the perfect addition to the stethoscope and oximeter you’ll use for teaching health class.
*You are just as thrilled (if not more thrilled) than your kids when you find a perfect insect specimen during a nature walk. Good thing you ordered that high-powered microscope that has been helpful for just about every scientific observation from a piece of lint to an insect leg.
*As part of their writing assignments, your kids write letters to the editor of the local newspaper on the topic of their choice. Their opinions are well-known throughout your community.
*You use grocery shopping as an opportunity for math, menu planning, economics, and P.E. (loading bags from the store, to the car, and from the car to the house builds cardiovascular health and strength). Your children know all about pantry patrol, food organization, and cupboard stocking procedures.
*Your children have the most varied and funnest P.E. classes that include family bike rides, hiking, jumproping competitions, volleyball games, and badminton wars.
*You’ve been majorly crushing on that cute principal at your homeschool.
*Your living room hosts a permanent homemade blanket fort because that’s where your kids love to do their schoolwork.
*You are well-known and loved for all the treats your kids make in baking class and deliver to friends in the neighborhood.
*The stares from fellow shoppers at the grocery store as you shop with your kids during the day no longer phase you and you have the entire “socialization argument” down to a science and can recite it in your sleep.
*Your kids can glance at a piece of correspondence, a newspaper article, or an online news story and pick out all the grammatical errors in 20 seconds or less. And they’ve written their own novel in a year as an English assignment.
*The librarians at the local library can see you and your “students” coming from a mile away because you’re the ones who bring a U-haul to the library to load up all the books to check out.
*Your kids are avid readers and hurry to complete their work so they can start reading through that stack of books in the U-haul from the library.
And there it is in a nutshell…how to know you’re a homeschool mom!
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